Rivers of Thought
Life, Leadership, Business & Technology
As faithful readers know, my father recently passed away. It didn’t occur to me at the time, but in one final breath, I became the patriarch of the Ton family (going back at least four generations). It is now my responsibility to pass on the stories, to pass on the traditions, to respect the past and those who have come before.
One of the joys of the last few years has been taking my grandsons, Braxton and Jordan, to visit my dad, Popper (or great-Popper) – to see his face light up when those little guys would bound into his room, show him their new games, or demonstrate their latest artwork. Dozens of images come to mind…Braxton pushing my dad in his wheelchair on the last Thanksgiving he would visit our house, or crawling onto his bed to play games with him when Dad could no longer get up. Jordan telling a story so funny both of them were laughing and giggling, or Dad wearing Jordan’s Easter hat to the delight of the little red-head.
Two months almost to the day of dad’s passing, we welcomed Jasper Bryant Ton into the world. The second son of my second son. What an amazing joy to hold that little life in my arms, to look into his eyes. I could not help but think of my dad. He did not have a chance to meet Jasper, but I know he would adore him. My heart was overflowing with love.
Braxton’s and Jordan’s memories of their time with my dad will fade, Jasper has no memories to fade. Yes, there are pictures, hundreds of pictures, but it will be the stories that provide the connection. I want them to know of his laugh, his smile, his compassion, his goofy sense of humor. Most of all, I want them to know of his love, love for my mom, love for his family, and love for his fellow man and woman.
I treasure the moments I have with my kids and my grandkids. Even on days when I am preoccupied with work, or too tired and crabby to be patient, or when there thousands of tasks that don’t get done. I celebrate my role as patriarch – to tell stories of Mary Ellen and Gene, Lawrence and Sara, Hallie and Mary and the generations who came before.
Welcome to the world, Jasper Bryant Ton. You have been born into a family that loves you dearly. You have been born into a family with an amazing story. I can’t wait to share it all with you.
Employee Engagement = Vision
It’s a topic that continually comes up in conversation with business leaders. How do I get my employees engaged? How do I keep them engaged? It’s all about vision.
Most people want to be a part of something larger than themselves.
In my video post on LinkedIn last week, I posed the question, “Do you have a vision so compelling that people want to join you on the journey to achieve your vision?”
To me, it’s a fundamental question of leadership.
I believe we all want followers who:
- are engaged
- want to achieve what we want to achieve
- are so fanatical about our shared vision that they spend every day moving toward that vision.
As leaders, we need to learn to paint. Yes, paint.
Start with your vision
You DO have one, right?
Is it aspirational?
Does it serve as a guide for current and future initiatives?
Is it compelling?
Does it go beyond the numbers?
I read a great blog post a few years ago. It was titled something like “Your ROI is Not a Vision”. In it, the author explained why your vision must go beyond the numbers. Profitability, revenue, and EBITDA may get you up in the morning, but for most of your team, that is not what gets them:
- engaged
- excited, or
- up in the morning.
Your employees want something to believe in – something aspirational.
If your vision doesn’t give them that, they will never be fully engaged.
You may need to reexamine your vision…right now.
Learning to paint
You have a vision! Now, you have to communicate it…to everyone… every day.
You have to paint a picture of your vision so compelling that people want to join your company just to be a part of it. Painting this picture takes time – often more time than developing the vision itself.
Let’s play a game of word association. I am going to say (okay, type) a word. I want you to respond with the first word that pops in your head.
Ready?
Ball.
Ok. How many thought “game” or “bat” or “basket” or a “fancy party”? All great “pictures” in our mind’s eyes of a ball. But, we aren’t on the same page.
Let’s try again…
Baseball.
Ok, now what came to mind? “Stadium”, “Cubs”, “Cardinals”? Some may even have thought “boring”. Again, we are closer, but we still have different pictures in mind.
What if we spent time as a group talking about our baseball? It’s brand new. It comes in a box. When we open the box, it is wrapped in that white crinkly paper. The smell of the leather reaches our nostrils.
As we unwrap the ball, the leather is bright white. The red stitching literally pops in contrast. As we run our fingers along the stitches, they feel like a washboard. The leather is soft, but the ball is hard. We see the major league baseball logo, the commissioner’s signature.
Now, when I say “Let’s play ball”, chances are great that we will all see the same image in our minds. That is painting a picture. That is putting your listener or reader into the picture.
I would love to hear from you. What is your vision?
Have you painted a picture for your followers?
Can they see themselves in that picture?
Post a comment, send an email, or give me a call!
I want to hear your stories!
Time To Pause?
Here we are.
February Groundhog’s Day Valentines Day Super Bowl. Also the month of yours truly’s birthday my youngest son’s birthday my mother-in-law’s birthday AND we are expecting a new grandson any day now and it promises to be another crazy month.
[should I leave myself a second to catch a breath and add punctuation? No, no time…]
All this after the hustle and bustle of the holidays shopping parties family the beautiful chaos of grandchildren. Then before we have a chance to breathe, the new year upon us. Everyone, everywhere urging us to hit the ground running new goals new budgets. sales kick-off.
Every other post on LinkedIn about setting goals for personal and professional growth: get up earlier and stay up later to get stuff done. Out-hustle the competition, drive focus. life hacks.
I’m just as guilty.
I have a morning routine to send a text to my two adult sons.
As I look back on the texts, they are filled with “Make it a great week”, “Let’s rock this thing”, do-this do-that. Push Drive Focus.
Just. Push. Play.
It might be time to…
….Press Pause.
We all get caught up in the:
- day-to-day.
- drive to succeed (whatever your definition of success may be).
We forget to pause, reflect, re-charge.
For me, the reminder came at a time when I needed it most.
In addition to the whirlwind that is the holidays and the start of a new year, my father passed away in mid-December.
Planning the services (yes, we had two), making arrangements for his cremation, holding the services, family events, notifying his bank and investment firms, dispersing funds to his heirs…all the details and tasks that must be given attention.
And then the reminder came…
…in the form of a note from a colleague:
I know the clashing feelings of relief that your loved one is no longer in pain and also missing them terribly. And I know the bewilderment of watching the rest of the world breeze right along at an absurd pace while you are like, “Wait a minute, can we all pause please. This deserves a pause.”
I hope you find time to pause. This does deserve a pause.
The reminder.
You.
Deserve.
A.
Pause.
The power of a pause.
You don’t have to be grieving the loss of a loved one to benefit from a pause.
Your:
- body needs it.
- mind needs it.
- heart needs it.
Ask a personal trainer.
They will tell you one of the most important parts of working out is the pause between reps; the pause between intense workouts; the pause away from the gym.
Our muscles recover; the tissue regenerates; and bodies come back stronger.
Not only is it beneficial, but it is also required
Ask a professional speaker.
One of the most effective ways to make a point is to pause. To stop moving on stage. To hold silence for one, two, three seconds or more.
The silence grabs the audience. It causes them to pay attention. It gives them a moment to reflect on the point.
Ask a doctor.
Our health is dependent upon pause.
A pause in the form of sleep is needed to restore energy.
A pause will help our bodies heal from an injury and recover from an illness. It will help to prevent illness in the first place.
As leaders, we need a pause. Our followers need one. They also need us to pause.
It’s a powerful thing.
It gives us time to rest.
A time to reflect.
And, it gives us time to recharge.
My challenge to you today is not to do more.
Rather, my challenge to you is to do less.
Take a timeout.
Put aside the to-do list and all the things that must get done.
Put down the phone.
Clear your mind of the thousands of issues you are trying to solve.
Build a fire in the fireplace and just watch the flames.
Take a walk and listen to the sounds around you.
Find a peaceful spot to sit. and. just. be…still.
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Insights is the weekly, thought-provoking newsletter from Jeffrey S. Ton.
Every Tuesday – Delivered to your inbox.
A different focus each week:
Leadership Thought – A lesson-learned, an insight shared
Leadership Q&A – A response to a reader’s or a connection’s question
Leadership Spotlight – A highlight of a person or company helping others to grow their leadership
Rivers of Thought – A more personal thought, observation or musing
